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On the Road with Rupert
The misguided travels of a misspent youth.

This is my first time. Please be gentle. I hope it'll be as good for you as it was for me. But no matter how it turns out, I promise that I'll try my best.

Perhaps an introduction is in order. I know that it'll be a one-sided affair for the moment but I figured that someone has to make the first move. Nevertheless, I'd love to hear from you since I am a self-confessed email addict.(1)

Anyway, here's a little about myself.

I'm a writer and pretty darn happy about it. I sit at my desk everyday, stare into the screen, tap away at the keyboard, and swirl my mouse around. The work isn't excessively stressful and deadlines are reasonable. The only drawback may be the fact that I'm not getting much of a tan sitting in the office all day and I'm starting to develop a sickly-looking pallor. My sister has taken to calling me 'beancurd skin'. That and the constant nagging from my parents to make something of myself.

I've been abroad for quite a few years to further my studies and I've only returned recently. This has probably been part of the reason why I feel rather out of place in a country, which is supposed to be home. One of the things that irked me most when I first returned was not knowing what to do in my spare time and after hours. I felt really lost and it got quite depressing every time a weekend came around. I think I was about to wrap my hands around my own throat to throttle the boredom out of myself when I decided that it would have been rather … unwise. After all, I was complaining about not having a life. I guess part of me wants to share my experiences with you in the hope that you won't have to go through the same misery, or at least entertain you when you see how pathetic my little attempts are.

I don't have an IQ of 220 and I don't solve advanced calculus equations without breaking into a sweat; but I am told that it doesn't take a genius to find the popular spots in town as well as around the country. The problem I've stumbled across is that everyone seems to be telling me different things. And I can't think of a logical way to filter through the information. I've arrived at the conclusion that I'll just have to judge for myself.

I live in Kuala Lumpur. Well… actually I live in the state of Selangor but the borders between these two are pretty meaningless. I am told that the Sultan of Selangor ceded the territory to our Federal government and I'm sure he must have gotten something in return. I believe the grand arch that straddles the Federal Highway on the border between the state of Selangor and the Federal Territory was built for the Sultan in recognition of this transfer. I pass it every time I head downtown from the suburbs where I live. As a child, I used to do a countdown as I approached it from a distance. "10…9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… I'm in Kuala Lumpur! Yayyyyyyyy!" What can I say? I had a pretty strange childhood but that's a story for another time.

Anyway, if you were to travel from the suburbs of Subang, where the old international airport used to be, down the Federal Highway into Kuala Lumpur, the first exit you'll come across after the arch will lead to Bangsar. A focal point of nightlife in Kuala Lumpur and reminiscent of Soho in London, Bangsar is a curious mix of cultures. Ancient coffee shops and hawker stalls squeeze alongside trendy bars and cafes. On Saturday nights, a few streets are closed to vehicles and a night market mushrooms in its place. I personally love this place because there's a Starbucks right in the middle of the action. I sit strategically to face the street so that I can admire the aesthetic attributes of the many beautiful women who frequent this watering hole. I get two out of three of my favorite food groups(2) and hope for some engaging conversation with someone other than myself. Simplicity in existence is probably a secret to happiness.

But I think I'm getting a little tired of Bangsar, mostly because parking can be quite a pain. I must qualify that statement though. Parking is a pain if you're looking for free parking. Unless you intend to circle around the area endlessly, like a fly circling a cow turd hoping for a sweet spot, the better choice would be to park in the multi-story car park, which I know as the "Jolly Green Giant". I'm not sure if that's the actual name of the place but I haven't bothered to take the time to find out. I'm usually too busy looking for that sweet spot.

I've also decided to try out a new place in Desa Sri Hartamas. It's a few kilometers off the North Klang Valley Expressway tucked away in a growing housing area. I spoke to a manager of one of the establishments there. He proudly proclaimed the area the second Bangsar, but then hunched in a conspiratorial posture, he whispered that business has not been too good. I think it's probably because the new office blocks around the area are not fully occupied yet, so it's just a matter of waiting around till the clientele moves in. In a selfish sort of way, I do hope it stays off the beaten track since I appreciate the relatively quiet. So I wonder why I'm even telling you about this place. Forget you ever heard it from me… looooook intooooo my eyessssss… you… will… forget…forget…

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(1)The writer of this article can be e-mailed at editorial@marimari.com and slagged off for unloading his neuroses on the website. Please enter 'On the Road with Rupert' as the subject of your emails.

(2)Alcohol, nicotine and caffeine

 

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